A new look at old me

I am recovering nicely from the bariatric surgery and my weight has dropped nicely. I'm tired of liquid. I'm ready for a steak. At least I thought I was. So I tried some soup with some pieces in it and I have found out that I'm not ready for steak. Or even crackers. I go back to the Doctor a week from Tuesday and I get the dreaded pureed food. One of my friends had a broken jaw many years ago. He's not in love with pureed food. Especially pureed pizza. So how am I to handle the next phase? I'm hoping spices will help. I can imagine pureed chicken in broth with a little curry or some chicken spice. Maybe a puree of crab meat with lemon. Scaring you yet? It does me. I've read that nothing tastes as good as skinny feels. I understand in a way. But right now, I want both.

Dreaming

I have forgotten her name. She lives in California and is a jewelry designer with her own shop. I'm impressed with her because she looks very comfortable in her own skin. She is obviously a beautiful woman and has a style all her own. I've always aspired to that and to exude confidence. I'm not good at it. Even when I seem confident I'm not.  I had hoped that by the time I hit 60 I'd be there. Does it ever happen? I'm still waiting.

There's just one thing

I'm OK with how things are going on the path to the weight loss surgery. But I have discovered that some of the high protein supplements I'm taking actually taste worse than baby food. I'm taking powdered vitamins that are mixed with water. They are supposed to be orange flavor. They are really cardboard box flavor. I'm really glad there are squirt bottles of crystal light. Also some of the shake mixes are nasty. I've been forced to add flavors there too. But you know, that's actually a good thing. I'll be learning to plan stuff and to take something that tastes nasty and make it taste better. For the first 4 weeks after the surgery I'll be on liquids. So innovation will have to be the order of the day. I've never been good at that. Except when backed up against a wall. I'm glad to announce that I have hit the wall. If anyone has ideas for making any of the supplements taste better, I'd welcome them.

ch-ch-ch-changes

I think there are some ways that we age that are the same in all of us. For example, sometimes we lose people we care about and we must adjust to living without them. Sometimes there are new aches and pains in our bodies that cause our favorite activities to be a little less fun. If our hearing is less robust, the TV gets louder. If we were low energy folks, we don't change into athletes and if we were athletes we don't usually become couch potatoes.

One thing about aging that is universal is that it brings changes. I've been a couch potato for the last couple of years. My overweight body told me that if I don't do something soon to get up and move, I'll be moving into a wheel chair. That may be OK eventually and I do enjoy a good ride. But not now. I spent the morning doing the surgery prep things at the hospital. I've never been poked more, stuck more, or paid out more money before any other surgery.Maybe the insurance companies believe in erring on the side of safety. In other words, covering their asses. If so, I'll admit that it makes me feel much more secure in my choices of late. And I'm looking forward to a new day.

One other thing that has changed for me is that I have a new sister. She is the sister of my former husband. He and she weren't close and when we divorced he told me she didn't want to hear from me and to leave his family alone. Since I'm an only child with no other family I felt the loss of his family terribly. Well, brave girl that she is, she contacted me recently with the idea that we could meet and talk. It's been about 8 months and I can't get over how much her friendship has changed my life. I'm no longer without family. She and her husband are my family and I'm in love with the idea that I can phone her and she is glad to hear from me. It's a little thing but what a great change.

Judy's big new year

I finally got approved for the sleeve surgery which will occur on Feb. 24. I'm trying to get emotionally ready for it. It only took 6 weeks for the insurance company to realize they are carrying my insurance next year and give the go ahead. So in the meantime, it took 6 weeks for the flooring I ordered to be located and sent to town. It comes tomorrow and is supposed to be installed next week. And I lost a crown and have an appt with the dentist Wed. I hope he'll pull the danged thing. And my honey's grandmother died. And our computer broke down and the repair person doesn't seem to be able to fix it. So my honey, who is a big gamer, has been out of sorts in a major way. So he works in a building with no heat and holes and is on the river and Tues of last week it was six degrees inside and he came home early. No computer. Geesh. It's only Jan 13 and I may be tired of 2014 already.

Surgery

My refresh button is going to be bariatric surgery. I am waiting for the approval by the insurance company and then it will be scheduled. I hate the fact that I need to have the surgery because I always have a problem with anesthetic. But I hate continuing down the path I'm on even more. I have had a weight problem most of my life. When I was younger I had some control. But now, not so much. And I learned that after you pass a certain body mass index, there is a shift in the hormone balances and it is twice as hard to lose weight and almost impossible to keep it off. So because of the other health issues I have which are aggravated by the excess weight, I'm going to do the surgery.

I am thinking that all of the things I've learned so far say that I need to communicate with others when post surgery. I've joined a bariatric support site on the computer. But I thought I might do well to take my readers on this journey with me. A person can always use support. And maybe someone has been thinking about the surgery and would like to read my experiences. So as I wait for the insurance company to approve me, I'll start sharing my feelings and my activities. I hope for good luck with this step.

Sometimes it's not age

I'm having the most confusing time I've had in a long time. I've signed up for bariatric surgery and I'm waiting for the insurance company to let the doctor know they will pay for it and then they will call me and set up a time for the surgery. I've already had a conference with the doctor about the type of surgery and that is set. I've had lots of fluids taken and tested. I've had testing with a psychologist and  I'm taking iron and had a vitamin D shot.

I was told to go on a 1200 calorie diet. That's really funny because if I could stick to that I wouldn't have needed to have the surgery. Meanwhile I'm wondering where I should be on the diabetes. And I've been told that I won't be able to take pills after the surgery for quite a while. And I'm supposed to find other ways to take the meds I need. And I'm supposed to be exercising. And that is part of why I need the surgery. Bad back and bad knees limit exercise. I went on a cpap and I'm not needing naps as much during the day. But I'd love to have more of the energy that some folks talk about.

Now for the fun. Iron stops me up so I take something to fix that. It works too well often. The cpap helps with breathing at night so I don't snore but does nothing for the stopped up nose due to allergies. And none of the things I've been doing are helping my memory. I still can't think of words sometimes. I suppose I was expecting too much too soon. I guess I need to be more patient. But I'm 68 and sometimes I become impatient.

Isn't it fun to get old?